Who do you want to be?
Happy Friday you wonderful humans.
[Virtus Performance, Mornington]
Are you living the life you want to live? This is a simple enough question, but not so easy to answer.
If the answer is yes, you're nailing it. Things will still be hard, you'll still experience heartache, frustration, disappointment, you'll be sad and angry and upset. But, as Mo Gawdat explains in his book Solve for happy
"The gravity of the battle means nothing for those at peace"
If you can answer yes to that question you're one of the few. One of the few who are truly happy. At peace. With yourself, and with the world. Keep doing what you're doing, and help others do the same.
If you answered no, I can promise you you're not alone. Researchers refer to happiness as "Subjective well-being" and a 2017 study has shown a consistent decline in happiness in the US over the past decade. Today's email isn't a dive into happiness, that's a topic for another day. This is a call to action. An open invitation to dive into your dissatisfaction and do something about it.
"The moment of descent and discovery begins at the moment you consciously become dissatisfied with life"
It's an oxymoron, but I believe you can be simultaneously happy and dissatisfied at the same time.
What do you want to do, who do you want to do it with, who do you want to be, what do you want your days to look like? Ultimately...
How do you want to live?
This is the question that we should be asking of ourselves and each other as we grow up and descend into adulthood. Creating a life by design. This is the ultimate call to action and reason for being. Take the plunge. Identifying wherein lies your dissatisfaction, and doing something about it, is the ultimate power move. If you're not living the life you believe you should be, let's take a step towards becoming that person.
I'm not here to tell you what to do, I'm here to (hopefully) empower you to make a choice. A choice to step up and do something about that thing (or things) that you feel are holding you back.
This is an adaptive challenge, meaning that you must evolve, from the person you are now, to become the person you want to be.
Here is a two-step process (as shown in Atomic Habits: James Clear) that I think is the best way to move forward in any area of your life.
1. Decide the person you want to be
2. Prove it to yourself by with small wins.
Each little win will is another brick in the wall to prove to yourself that you can become the person you can look up to, that you can become the hero of your own story.
If you want to be healthy, at each point of decision making ask yourself "What would a healthy person do?"
If you want to be strong at each point of decision making ask yourself "What would a strong person do?"
If you want to be wealthy, at each point of decision making ask yourself "What would a wealthy person do?"
If you want to be happy, at each point of decision making ask yourself "What would a happy person do?"
“You don’t say I’m going to build a wall, you say I’m going to lay this brick as perfectly as a brick can be laid and I’m going to do that every single day, soon enough I’ll have a wall” // Will Smith
We become who and what we believe we deserve. You deserve the world. But you need to believe it.
Be amazing. Do the thing.
p.s If this resonates with you, send it on to someone who it may help.
As always, if you need anything, you can contact me via firstname.lastname@example.org